We were standing on our patio. It was Friday night. I would check on the date, but my mind doesn’t seem to care.

It was four friends and I. One friend broke my heart in more ways than you can imagine. We were in heavy debate about the justice between social constructs in our country. He argued to me that we’re all equal. He gave me some bullshit rant about individual equality and that’s all that matters. But I do not agree. If we as a nation can’t break down the barriers that separate race, sex, and financial status then we’re not really equal, are we?

Later that night we go to a bar. We’re all laughing and having a good time. Dancing and just goofing around. Just plain ole’ clean fun. Good time comes to an end and we make one last stop at the bar. I initiate conversation to what I remember being a very young, attractive black man. He is very enthusiastic and when I ask if his job is annoying he is playful and responds “Only when people like you ask so many damn questions”. Then the individualist friend invades my conversation. He gets in a small verbal scuffle about who’s gay and what not. Very minute in theory, but it escalates to a racial comment and the bartender takes a step back. They make up and they both leave happy.

I sit in the car on the drive home listening to the loud “screeching” vocals of Lil Wayne and process the hatred both of them had. Both of them towards gay people and the white friend with his racial remarks.

I’m still thinking about this while the rest of my friends process the possibility that I might be losing my mind.

Do you really care this much if you’re losing your mind?